Several years into our marriage we felt we had figured out quite a few things. We were experiencing success in several areas. We were at a real high. Then over the next two years everything seemed to unravel. We seemed to be sliding backwards in everything we'd achieved. Our finances began heading downward. Eric's job took him out of the home far more than we were used to, and this took a heavy toll on our daughters and our marriage. We were barraged by a series of illnesses and more. We did our best, but about a year and half into this we seemed worse off than we had ever been. It was so bad we were considering divorce.
We came to learn through various sources (please see Resources) and a lot of prayer that we had much to learn about each other but most importantly about ourselves. We each had our own histories and our own stories about how marriage works; our roles as husband, wife, father and mother; how finances should work in a family, beliefs about money, etc. This challenging and rewarding journey has lead to the strong, peaceful, loving, unified marriage we enjoy today. We hope that whatever the current state of your marriage the truths in the following pages can show you how to create your ideal marriage, and in fact, enhance all your relationships and the overall level of joy in your life.
This book does not give all the answers for a successful marriage. What we do provide are tools to help you make it through any crisis and create a truly joyful life. You must do the work and have faith. The work includes praying, studying, learning skills that you lack, and most importantly, understanding the Atonement of Jesus Christ and using it in your life. Our hope is that we will all live our lives as the inspired and brilliant children of God who we are — that we will create the strong, unified, peaceful, loving marriages that we all deserve.
PLEASE NOTE: At the end of each chapter we are going to suggest “challenges.” Why would we do this? You can learn the ideas we are going to share by simply reading them; however, they are going to have significantly more impact and produce the desired positive change in your marriage if you'll do the challenges. We want you to go from understanding this information to LIVING it. Here's an example of why: Can you name all 50 states? You should be able to. We all had to spend weeks or even months memorizing them in grade school. Can't name them all? Neither can we anymore. However, can you remember your first kiss? Yep, we can too. Why? The time spent on memorizing the 50 states was much more than the first kiss lasted. Why can we remember the kiss better? It was experienced. We experienced it with more than one of our senses; therefore, it had a greater lasting impact. We memorized the 50 states with our mind, some of us added a song or mnemonic device to jog our memory, and we probably remember it better; however, we each experienced the first kiss on probably every possible level. Admit it — you can tell me where, when, the weather, time of day, maybe even what you were wearing.
The challenges at the end of each section takes the words you just read and turns them into an experience on many levels — if you'll let them — that will change who you are and stay with you for years to come. We highly encourage you to do them and do them with your whole heart! Completing the challenges will help this information change your life!
With Love,
Eric and Mindy Heath
December 2009 |
